The Cold Beer And Cigarettes series
by Isaki
Summary: They meet in the parking lot behind the lab toward the end of their shift and smoke their cigarettes, much in the way two Catholic school girls would - with an exquisite sense of sin and guilty pleasure.
1. Default Chapter

Fandom: CSI Pairing: Catherine/Sara, eventually. Rating: PG-13, for now. Disclaimer: They're not mine. Notes: First posted in the cathandsara community over at LiveJournal. Thanks go to it's lovely two moderators and the members for their great feedback. Summary: Sara is craving a cigarette, so she drinks water instead.  
  
Just Say No  
  
They say thirst lags behind dehydration. This must be true. Sara watches the drops of condensation slide down the inside of the plastic bottle in her hand, and tries to remember the last time she felt thirsty. She can't.  
  
Experts say irritability, grogginess and a feeling of heaviness are the first signs of dehydration. Sara's started carrying around a bottle wherever she goes; it gives her hands something to play with during breakroom meetings, when he's too busy not looking her in the eye to notice she's not paying attention to him at all.  
  
She's sure this new habit of hers has nothing to do with the fact that it's getting harder for her not to stop for cigarettes on her way to work. She gave up smoking over three years ago, and it has never given her any trouble before. Up until now. Now every time she buys a newspaper she has to almost physically hold herself back.  
  
Sara doesn't like watching the sun rise. It means her shift will soon be over. It means having to go home to an empty apartment and stare at the sunlight moving across the ceiling of her bedroom. But it's a slow night, and Nick has taken off with Warrick and the only homicide of the evening. Greg's running some samples in Trace. And Sara is craving a cigarette, so she drinks water instead.  
  
She tenses when another person rounds the corner to the back of the building, forgets to relax as she realizes it's Catherine.  
  
"Someone should inform college students once and for all that the suicidal roommate rule is a myth," she says, and exhales.  
  
Sara watches her coworker as she leans back against the wall. She fears Catherine will look up and catch her watching so she turns her head away, and for a moment it's just the view of the red sky, the feel of the cool plastic against the palm of her hand, and the sound of Catherine rummaging through her handbag.  
  
"Want one?" Catherine asks. When Sara looks to her side, Catherine has one cigarette between the slender fingers of her left hand and an open pack in the other, offering it to her. She must have noticed a change in Sara's expression, a need she's been trying to hide because when Sara looks back at the smaller woman's face, Catherine is smiling seductively. "Go ahead," she says.  
  
Sara hesitates. 


	2. A Bad Name

Fandom: CSI Pairing: Catherine/Sara, eventually. Rating: PG-13, for now. Disclaimer: They're not mine. Notes: First posted in the cathandsara community over at LiveJournal. Thanks go to it's lovely two moderators and the members for their great feedback. Summary: "Must be much less complicated when you're in a line of work where you surround yourself with the promise of sex."  
  
A Bad Name  
  
There couldn't possibly be a more wonderful addiction to fall back on. It has been seven days since Sara gave into the temptation Catherine offered to her, and already she's forgotten why she ever decided to quit smoking. It could very well have been a weak attempt to prove - to others more than to herself - that she's strong enough to kick such a habit, that she's not dependent on anything - and anybody - but herself.  
  
Of course she would never admit to her coworkers that she's started smoking again. The only one who knows of Sara's descent is the woman who ingnited it. Catherine smokes with a desperation that borders on pure lust.  
  
"So, was it the victim's girlfriend?" she asks, alluding to the case Sara and Warrick have been working on.  
  
Sara nods. "Ann Brody confessed to stabbing Marissa Waters in a jealous lover's rage. Crime of passion."  
  
They share a common bond, now - it's becoming a routine. They meet in the parking lot behind the lab toward the end of their shift and smoke their cigarettes, much in the way two Catholic school girls would - with an exquisite sense of sin and guilty pleasure. It has an interesting side- effect; in the long shadows of the early morning sun, with most of their work done for the night and the nicotine starting to have its soothing effect, Sara isn't as cautious as usual when she studies the woman next to her, and Catherine's body language is more relaxed and comfortable.  
  
"It's girls like Ann Brody that give us a bad name," Catherine says on a light column of smoke.  
  
Sara smirks. "Only one point five percent of all convicted killers are female," she says. "I doubt they're going to hold this one against us."  
  
"That's not the kind of 'us' I was referring to."  
  
Sara is curious, but she would rather strip naked and perform a song from 'Oklahoma' right here in the parking lot than admit this fact to Catherine. She flicks her burned down cigarette onto the ground and feigns disinterest. "Then what were you referring to?"  
  
Catherine tosses the bud of her own cigarette away. "Sara..." she starts, turning toward the other woman, "Have you ever murdered anyone?"  
  
Sara frowns, meeting Catherine's eyes. "No."  
  
"Glad to hear it." She smirks at Sara's confused expression. "Neither have I, in case you were wondering."  
  
Sara's due back at the lab, but she knows this is not the moment to cut off their conversation. "Good to know," she tells Catherine with a slight smile.  
  
Catherine is still looking straight at her when she asks, "And have you ever kissed another woman?"  
  
Sara is momentarily speechless, but she quickly regains her composure. Leave it to Catherine to throw her off-balance with questions like this. Curiosity surmounts fear and Sara asks, "Have you?"  
  
Catherine smirks. "Done a lot more that that."  
  
Sara feels suddenly dizzy as she observes her coworker think back to some obviously pleasant memories. She sees Catherine reach for her pack of Marlboro Lights again, and she somehow feels like they're crossing another line when she accepts the cigarette offered to her. Catherine lights it, her hand inches from Sara's face.  
  
"It's the stereotype that makes me nauseous," she says. "Marissa and Ann were lovers - one ends up dead, the other a murderer." She takes a long drag. "Most will assume this is what you're capable of when you're a woman who sleeps with other women."  
  
Sara shifts her weight from one foot to the other. She decides that, to keep Catherine from turning her attention back to Sara, asking questions is probably her best chance. "Are you... do you consider yourself bisexual?"  
  
Catherine shrugs. "I don't know. Does it matter?"  
  
Sara doesn't say a word, but Catherine isn't really expecting an answer. "It's the environment, I guess," she muses, staring at a midnight blue Mercedes parked just a couple of feet away. "After a while, you don't feel the need to categorize anymore. If there's one thing I learned from those years, it's thinking outside the box."  
  
Sara knows better than to meet Catherine's eyes, but she nods. "Must be much less complicated when you're in a line of work where you surround yourself with the promise of sex."  
  
Catherine quietly taps the tip of ash from the end of her cigarette. "Less complicated than what?"  
  
Sara's a deer caught in the head lights of an eighteen wheeler truck, and she plays nervously with the cigarette between her fingers. What is she doing here, anyway? She gave up smoking over three years ago, along with a couple of other bad habits. Greg is waiting for her at the lab.  
  
Sara's silence extends past the point where it's still casual, and Catherine searches for Sara's eyes. Sara meets her gaze, eventually, in spite of the fear that flares up her spine at the realization she sees dawning in Catherine's eyes. Catherine blinks, and Sara looks quickly away.  
  
"My my, Sara Sidle..." Catherine drawls, and Sara can hear the smile in her voice. "Could it be the girl has an unexpected side after all?"  
  
She's past the point of no return, and the only way for her to get out of this situation with some of her pride intact seems to be getting it over with as quickly as possible. Sara decides to give Catherine what she wants, but not before uttering an exaggerated sigh. She frowns.  
  
"Harvard. Sophomore year, 1991." Sara's voice is barely audible when she adds, "I met her at a microbiology and molecular genetics seminar."  
  
Catherine sounds almost disappointed when she responds, "Everyone experiments in college, right?"  
  
She has no idea how wrong she is, and Sara's nervousness is quickly replaced with anger. "It wasn't like that." Sara's harsh tone forms a chilling contrast with the laid back atmosphere that has formed around them, and Catherine seems startled at Sara's response.  
  
"It wasn't like that." Sara has lost all interest in the cigarette she's holding, and she stubs it out against the wall. "I have to get back."  
  
Catherine blinks in confusion as Sara hurries past her. "Hey, Sara..."  
  
Two more large strides, then she stops. Sighs. Turns around. "Look, forget it, okay?" Her tone is calmer now. "It's fine. I just don't feel like talking about it."  
  
Catherine looks lost. "Sure."  
  
Sara continues on through the back entrance of the crime lab, and swears she'll never touch a cigarette again. 


End file.
